Thursday, May 26, 2022

Modern Funny

Morris Gallo

This was sent to me, do you think its true?

From: “Michael Wagner”

>To: [email protected], [email protected],

[email protected],

>[email protected], [email protected], [email protected],

>[email protected], [email protected], [email protected]

>Subject: Re: Do you know anyone like this??

>Date: Tue, 16 Nov 1999 09:41:02 PST

>

>On Mon, 15 Nov 1999 09:30:57 -0700, Pierce, Jenny wrote:

>

> > This has got to be one of the funniest I’ve heard of in a long

> > time.

> >

> > I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a

true

> > story from the Word Perfect Helpline which was transcribed from a

> > recording

> > monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the

> >

> > Help desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the

> > Word

> > Perfect organization for “Termination without Cause.” Actual

> > dialogue of a

> >

> >

> > former WordPerfect Customer Support employee (now I know why they

> >

> > record these conversations!)

> >

> >

> >

> > Ridge Hall computer assistance; may I help you?”

> >

> > Yes, well, I’m having trouble with Word Perfect.”

> >

> > “What sort of trouble?”

> >

> > “Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went

> > away.”

> >

> > “Went away?”

> >

> > “They disappeared.”

> >

> > “Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?”

> >

> > “Nothing.”

> >

> > “Nothing?”

> >

> > “It’s blank; it won’t accept anything when I type.”

> >

> > “Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?”

> >

> > “How do I tell?”

> >

> > “Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?”

> >

> > “What’s a sea-prompt?”

> >

> > “Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?”

> >

> > “There isn’t any cursor: I told you, it won’t accept anything I

type.”

> >

> >

> > “Does your monitor have a power indicator?”

> >

> > “What’s a monitor?

> >

> > “It’s the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does

it

> > have a

> >

> >

> > little light that tells you when it’s on?”

> >

> > “I don’t know.”

> >

> > “Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power

>cord

> > goes into it. Can you see that?”

> >

> >

> >

> > “Yes, I think so.”

> >

> > “Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it’s plugged

> > into the wall.

> >

> >

> >

> > “Yes, it is.”

> >

> > When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were

> >

> > two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?”

> >

> > “No.”

> >

> > “Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the

> > other cable.”

> >

> > “Okay, here it is.”

> >

> > “Follow it for me, and tell me if it’s plugged securely into the

> > back of your computer.”

> >

> >

> >

> > “I can’t reach it.”

> >

> > “Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?”

> >

> > “No.”

> >

> > “Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?”

> >

> > “Oh, it’s not because I don’t have the right angle – it’s because

> > it’s dark.”

> >

> >

> > “Dark?”

> >

> > “Yes -the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming

> > in from the window.”

> >

> >

> >

> > “Well, turn on the office light then.”

> >

> > “I can’t.”

> >

> > “No? Why not?”

> >

> > “Because there’s a power failure.”

> >

> > “A power… A power failure? Aha, Okay, we’ve got it licked now.

Do

> > you

> >

> > still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer

> > came in?”

> >

> >

> > “Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.”

> >

> > “Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like

it

> >

> > was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it

> > from.”

> >

> > “Really? Is it that bad?”

> >

> > “Yes, I’m afraid it is.”

> > Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?”

> >

> > Tell them you’re too damn stupid to own a computer.”

>

RECENT NEWS

Get unlimited access!

Join EDGE ADVANTAGE and unlock The O&P EDGE's vast library of archived content.

O&P JOBS

Welcome Back!

Login to your account below

Retrieve your password

Please enter your username or email address to reset your password.

The O&P EDGE Magazine
Are you sure want to unlock this post?
Unlock left : 0
Are you sure want to cancel subscription?